But life had other plans for us and decided that we were ready to be parents, and after the hardest and longest two and half years of our lives, the universe brought in our baby son on January 1, 2012.
We've been in a whirlwind of emails and phone calls with our case workers over the past couple of weeks, but are finally in a secure place where we can start to tell the world that we have a son. Everything is happening very fast, we have nothing in the house except a picture frame that has the word family written on it. We barely have health insurance. But none of that matters, because we finally have a child and can finally be parents. So, here is a timeline of how it happened.
- January 1 - 8:00am, unbeknownst to us at the time, our son was born
- January 3 - Birth-mother chose our profile out of 12
- January 5 - Agency called to tell us a birth-mother had chosen us and had given birth
- January 10 - We meet birth-mother and birth-grandmother for first time at agency
- January 17 - Birth-mother surrenders right, begins 10-day waiting period (our home state's requirement, varies by states)
- January 19 - We meet birth-mother again for second time, with counselors, and have lunch at restaurant. See pictures of the baby for the first time. Set date for placement
- January 27 - End of business day, 10 day waiting period will expire.
- January 30 - Placement ceremony, we will meet our son for the first time and bring him home.
We have called everybody in our adoption circle and they are all excited. We even called the SIL and she is happy too!!!! Nobody can believe this is happening right now, and neither can we. It's been very difficult to function in society for the past three weeks with this going on. Who knows how many mistakes I have made at work, and our two emotions are either elated, ecstatic ecstasy or walking around the house like a zombie in disbelief and realizing that by the end of the month, their will be a baby in this house that has been empty for so long.
Taking the advise of our case workers, we waited until this week and the surrender to start telling people. We will maybe go shopping this weekend and start to learn about the products. They told us to only buy what you need to get through two weeks, so bottles, formula, diapers, (adorable) one-sies, car seat. They didn't even bring up a bassinet, because they say we will probably sleep with him for some time (five years is not awkward, right??) Their major point was, take it super slow.
As for the birth-mother, she is wonderful and we really like her. We are going to have some level of openness but we don't know what that will look like at this point. We are going to take it one step at a time but our intention is to have an open relation. The birth-grandmother was amazing too, and we just really, really like them. It is a very bitter-sweet relationship.
So, there you have it. The count-down to the 27th is on so we are still proceeding with that in the back of our mind, but the case workers do not believe it is high risk and that she will change her mind. We even have chosen a name, and his first name comes from my side of the family, the middle name is from the birth-mother, and his last name will be DH's. So he will have a part of all us in his name.
Now, all I need to do is remember how to make a bottle. Help!!