Saturday, January 21, 2012

We Are Going to Be Parents!

Never in my wildest dreams did we think we would be able to write this blog so soon. We imagined being on the wait-list for a year and spending 2012 writing posts about adoption statistics, openness, and other things that floated in and out of our minds while we were waiting for our child.

But life had other plans for us and decided that we were ready to be parents, and after the hardest and longest two and half years of our lives, the universe brought in our baby son on January 1, 2012.

We've been in a whirlwind of emails and phone calls with our case workers over the past couple of weeks, but are finally in a secure place where we can start to tell the world that we have a son. Everything is happening very fast, we have nothing in the house except a picture frame that has the word family written on it. We barely have health insurance. But none of that matters, because we finally have a child and can finally be parents. So, here is a timeline of how it happened.

Adoption Timeline:
  • January 1 - 8:00am, unbeknownst to us at the time, our son was born
  • January 3 - Birth-mother chose our profile out of 12
  • January 5 - Agency called to tell us a birth-mother had chosen us and had given birth
  • January 10 - We meet birth-mother and birth-grandmother for first time at agency
  • January 17 - Birth-mother surrenders right, begins 10-day waiting period (our home state's requirement, varies by states)
  • January 19 - We meet birth-mother again for second time, with counselors, and have lunch at restaurant. See pictures of the baby for the first time. Set date for placement
  • January 27 - End of business day, 10 day waiting period will expire.
  • January 30 - Placement ceremony, we will meet our son for the first time and bring him home.
We have called everybody in our adoption circle and they are all excited. We even called the SIL and she is happy too!!!! Nobody can believe this is happening right now, and neither can we. It's been very difficult to function in society for the past three weeks with this going on. Who knows how many mistakes I have made at work, and our two emotions are either elated, ecstatic ecstasy or walking around the house like a zombie in disbelief and realizing that by the end of the month, their will be a baby in this house that has been empty for so long.

Taking the advise of our case workers, we waited until this week and the surrender to start telling people. We will maybe go shopping this weekend and start to learn about the products. They told us to only buy what you need to get through two weeks, so bottles, formula, diapers, (adorable) one-sies, car seat. They didn't even bring up a bassinet, because they say we will probably sleep with him for some time (five years is not awkward, right??) Their major point was, take it super slow.

As for the birth-mother, she is wonderful and we really like her. We are going to have some level of openness but we don't know what that will look like at this point. We are going to take it one step at a time but our intention is to have an open relation. The birth-grandmother was amazing too, and we just really, really like them. It is a very bitter-sweet relationship.

So, there you have it. The count-down to the 27th is on so we are still proceeding with that in the back of our mind, but the case workers do not believe it is high risk and that she will change her mind. We even have chosen a name, and his first name comes from my side of the family, the middle name is from the birth-mother, and his last name will be DH's. So he will have a part of all us in his name. 

Now, all I need to do is remember how to make a bottle. Help!!

13 comments:

  1. Amazing!!! How wonderful is adoption??!!! :-)

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    1. Thank you! It has been such an amazing experience!

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  2. I am incredibly happy for you guys and so glad yolu shared it with us! More champagne!!!! I can't wait to meet your SON! :)

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    1. I am so glad I shared too, it felt so good!! I can't wait to meet him either!!!!

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  3. WONDERFUL NEWS! WAHOO! I am so excited for you guys!

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  4. Coming from Suzy's blog...Congratulations!

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  5. Wonderful news! You will hold your baby soon and the learning curve will take care of itself. You may worry about the manual for parenting, but no one ever gave your baby one to grade you on! LOL! Enjoy the ride.

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  6. Congrats! I'm always amazed at how quickly things can change with adoption.

    How wonderful, also, that you like your son's birth family. Kudos to you for being open to being open. We've found that as good as it's been for us and our children's birth parents, it's been really grounding for our children, especially now that they are really figuring out their identities (they are 8 and 10).

    Have a wonderful month! Wow!

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  7. This is such great news! Congratulations to you and your new family. I hope these next few days go by quick for you!

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  8. What fantastic news! Congratulations. Only a couple of days to go now right?! I am over the moon for you.

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  9. I know I'm really late, but congratulations! I found your blog through internet connections, and my DH and I met you guys back at the October Resolve meeting. This is SUPER exciting for you guys and we are so happy for you! :-)

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    1. Thank you! Isn't crazy how we all find each other on the internet? I can't believe all the time that has gone by since this post. I just took him to his four month well baby today. I wish you and your DH all the hope and peace in the world as you wait for your child. After going through it now myself, I know that our son was chosen for us for a reason and so no matter how long the wait, keep that in your heart! It will all make since when the time comes.

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